It's Andy Fish!

File this under would you rather have projectile vomiting or explosive diarrhea?

As I wrote way back ten or so days ago I sat through the first six installments of the Friday the 13th Franchise, and can honestly say if these are your favorite movies of all time you need some real help. Real professional help, like round the clock team of experts in Vienna type help.

I’d seen HALLOWEEN (1978) many years ago, and I do consider it a classic in modern horror despite some serious flaws (the acting of two of the females in the movie for one), but Donald Pleasance’s Dr Loomis is such a compelling character it’s hard to ignore its place in film history. His first appearance in the film features him arriving at an asylum to pick up Michael Myers for a court appearance in dark driving rain only to come upon the inmates loose on the grounds (cleverly implying Michael escaped and the loonies followed without actually showing us that) is nothing short of brilliant. His panic seems genuine as to what has been unleashed on the world sells it.

Over the years I’ve seen the 2nd and 3rd parts, considered them much lesser films and dismissed them. Well since I sat through F13 I figured I could do the same for the Halloween series.

Part II was a little better than I remembered it– its got some unintentional laugh out loud moments that are supposed to be dramatic and some callbacks to the original film but at the end of it the idea of Michael being an unkillable killing machine actual weakens the character. It ends with a big explosion.

Part III was a departure, the idea being that the Halloween Series would feature all new characters and situations telling compelling frightening stories in a CREEPSHOW type of way was abandoned after fans cried out for a return of Michael Myers. III had some promise, it’s ruined by bad acting and a jingle so annoying you’ll hope a crazed lunatic kicks in your door so you can at least focus on something besides this movie.

Part IV tried some telekinetic connections between Michael and a young girl who should have easily been paid 10x her salary for putting up what she had to put up with through this violent slasher film.

Part V told pretty much the same story, and the young girl is back and now her asking price should have been 1000x but at the end of the day after watching five of these I have to say I give it to Halloween for at least trying to tell us a compelling and ongoing story. Yeah over at F13 Jason’s mom is a part of the narrative, but you almost have to soak your eyeballs in some gentle eye wash after forcing them to endure these two series.

I’ll go watch some classic Hammer Horror films from England or the Horror Series from Japan to help cleanse my memory.